Also, when I stopped buying clothes that were too small in hopes of fitting into them one day, I stopped hating myself every time I ate a damn cookie. Or you don’t reach it, and you fall into a pit of self-loathing. As soon as you set a goal, you become obsessed, then you reach it and don’t really love yourself anymore because your weight isn’t what makes you love yourself. If you need to unfollow your father or cousin or best friend from high school to take a breather, do it. I am currently using the unfollow button whenever they hell I want, and it feels so good. It’s all right to say,”Let’s talk about something else, I’m not a good sounding board for you.” 9. Not to mention the fact you are tolerating this conversation would be pretty hurtful to the friend or family member under discussion if they were to find out, which they probably will. When you allow yourself to be open to this negativity on a regular basis, you feel heavy and in a pissy mood yourself. We all need to vent sometimes, but we’ve had that friend or family member who loves a good drama-soaked evening and literally can’t carry on a conversation unless they are slamming someone. It’s fun and all, but I’ll be damned if I am going to spend money I could put into my kids’ college fund on an organic hair towel that costs $100. #All things done without reason freeI want to support other people and spend a little money so they can get free shit, I really do. Buying something from every online party I’m invited to Not all chemicals are bad do some research and then live your damn life. A good mix of fast food, well0-balanced meals, and trying to be healthy most of the time is good enough. Organic berries will drain my bank account the way my kids go through them. Those organic cheese crackers just don’t cut it. But this is what makes me comfortable, and this is how I will continue to raise my kids. I’m more strict than most other parents (or so I’m told). Let’s be real, there is always some level of caring, but when you start thinking that way and taking note of what everyone else is doing and feeling you have to model their behavior, you are held prisoner to everyone else’s standard. But so often we power through with an explanation that’s not needed. It’s one thing if someone is asking you a question and wants to have a discussion, or you’ve hurt their feelings. Long gone are the days I feel I need to justify myself and the decisions I make in order to stay mentally healthy. When I’d give my kids a consequences, I’d explain myself there too. If I declined a party invitation or canceled plans, I used to offer long explanations. Leave the bed a jumbled mess and get a coffee instead. A made bed does not make the world a happier place, and being late to places for this reason is stupid and made my stress level rise. I used to make my bed every damn day, even if it meant I was late for work. No one wants you to be their friend out of obligation, and no one wants a friend they have to talk themselves into spending time with. Breaking up with a friend is hard to do, but sometimes it’s necessary. People change and sometimes we don’t change together. Whatever the reason, just because you live close doesn’t mean you have to hang out if you don’t want to. Maybe you don’t like your neighbors and spending time with them makes you want to pull out your eyelashes. Sometimes these are delightful, and sometimes you just aren’t in the mood. It’s freeing once you stop doing certain things like: 1. Take it from someone who spent too long doing things she didn’t want to do only to be left with lots of resentment and sore shoulders. If people get upset with you for eliminating things in your life, they find a way to make it through, promise. Except you will be happier and the world won’t actually fall apart because you are breaking your asshole trying to do it all because frankly, you are not that important and people learn to get along without you. Guess what happens when you start saying “no” to shit you hate? Nothing. For years, I did things I didn’t want to do because I didn’t know what would happen if I didn’t do them. It’s taken me four decades to realize there are things in my life I don’t have to do.
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